Not a Bit of It!

"How are we going to get the life that has no lust, no self-interest, no sensitiveness to pokes, the love that is not provoked, that thinketh no evil, that is always kind? The only way is by allowing not a bit of the old life to be left; but only simple perfect trust in God, such trust that we no longer want God's blessings, but only want Himself. Have we come to the place where God can withdraw His blessings and it does not affect our trust in Him? When once we see God at work, we will never bother our heads about things that happen, because we are actually trusting in our Father in Heaven Whom the world cannot see." ~ Oswald Chambers

In my time this morning, I was captured by the above section of My Utmost for His Highest, especially the bolded part.  Have I come to a point where my trust in Christ is such that it is not contingent on my circumstances?  Do I believe that He is good, even when my circumstances may seem otherwise?  When I'm overwhelmed with all that is not good in my life or others' lives, do I still trust?  Is my desire to know Him so strong that I no longer want what He gives me, I merely want Him?  These thoughts and questions ran through my mind this morning and have yet to leave me 2 hours later.  My heart's cry is that I could say yes to each of these questions.  Yes Lord, you are enough for me.  Yes Lord, my only desire is You, do in my life what you please.  But I'm afraid that the fleshly part of me that Chambers refers to when he says, "Not a bit of it!" still wreaks havic on my soul.  Oh Lord that I would be able to set aside this part of me.  Draw my heart to You until not a bit of it remains in me!