Trust and obey....

I was reminded of this phrase tonight during a great chat I had with my roommate (Thank you Nat for being patient with me!!) :o)  Inevitably the hymn popped into my head and I began to think about the words.  At this late hour and with the late nights I've kept most of this weekend, it took me a tad longer to get past the "doth"s and poetic approach the hymn has, but I began to really see the words in a new light.  The first verse has a very simple line and yet we find it (well, I find it, I won't speak for the rest of you out there) :o) hard to follow sometimes.  "When we walk with the Lord in the light of His Word..."  How often have I strayed from this?  How often have I told Christ, "Nah, I got this.  I don't need Your wisdom on the matter."?  How many days have I put aside my Bible for a TV show or a nap?  How many times have I used, "I'm just not good at memorizing" as an excuse to not memorize scripture?  To walk in the light of His Word requires that you first know His Word so you know where, how and when to walk.  The encouragement that follows, however, is worth the time.  "While we do His good will, He abides with us still...."  What a joy!! To know that He abides with us and has promised never to leave us.  There is nothing I can do and nothing the prince of this world can to do tear me away from Christ.  Once I'm His, I'm always His.  What joy and freedom can be found in that statement!  I'm never going to get it right all of the time.  I will make mistakes, but His grace is sufficient for me, for His power is made perfect in my weakness (2 Cor 12:9).  A simple refrain, but what joy can be found in it! "Trust and obey, for there's no other way to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey."  This is my prayer.

When we walk with the Lord in the light of His Word,
What a glory He sheds on our way!
While we do His good will, He abides with us still,
And with all who will trust and obey.

Trust and obey, for there's no other way
To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.

Not a shadow can rise, not a cloud in the skies,
But His smile quickly drives it away;
Not a doubt or a fear, not a sigh or a tear,
Can abide while we trust and obey.

Not a burden we bear, not a sorrow we share,
But our toil He doth richly repay;
Not a grief or a loss, not a frown or a cross,
But is blessed if we trust and obey.

But we never can prove the delights of His love
Until all on the altar we lay;
For the favor He show, for the joy He bestows,
Are for them who will trust and obey.

Then in fellowship sweet we will sit at His feet.
Or we'll walk by His side in teh way.
What He says we will do, where He sends we will go;
Never fear, only trust and obey.

Trust and obey, for there's no other way
To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.

Lord, let me prove the delights of Your love and help me lay all on the altar to You!

It's been one of those days....all week...

So, since Sunday I've been in somewhat of a funk.  I know some of the reasons (health related), but there doesn't seem to be one answer to explain the whole thing.  I feel like the whole week was somewhat summed up in my experience at Hastings tonight.  I was sitting in the Cafe area, waiting for Christine (dear one, I'm so thankful you were late to this meeting! God had some work to do. :o) )  Anyway, I was waiting for Christine with my coffee sitting on the table in front of me.  Somehow, and even to this moment I don't know how, I knocked the entire 16 oz. Americano all over the table and the floor.  It was like an explosion!  I didn't know coffee could fly so far! :o)  So, completely embarrased and slightly mortified, I begin cleaning up the table with napkins.  One of the cafe employees came over and, to his credit, made sure I was OK before he offered to help me clean it up.  I was thankful for the help, but at that point I almost would have rather have crawled under a rock or something. :o) I finished the table with the last of the napkins they had in their holder and he brought out a mop and cleaned the floor.  Once it was all clean, I sat down again at the table and the employee brought out a giant yellow Caution sign and placed it right next to my table.  (OK, it was probably really a normal sized one, but when something that bright is placed near you, just to bring even MORE attention to the fact that you just spilled your entire drink, it seems gargantuan!)  I laughed and said, "It's been one of those days...."  He smiled and laughed too.  As I sat there and thought through, I really feel that this whole experience has been a good representation of my week.  It has been one of those days.  I feel like there are giant yellow CAUTION signs blaring their way across so many things in my life and I feel like people can see them, even though I know better.  To make matters worse, I've treated some people as though they could see the CAUTION sign and instead of allowing them to get close, I've held them at arms length.  How many times will God have to give me a tangible lesson like this (how many more coffees will I need to spill?) before I get what He wants me to get?  Lord, help me learn this lesson.  This could get expensive (in more ways than one)!!

God's Perspective on the World....

Do you ever have a moment when you're smiling so big that you think your face just might fall off? :o)  Well, that was my evening.  I'm taking this class called Perspectives on the World Christian Movement and was pretty excited about taking it after all that I heard from others, but after tonight I'm am STOKED! (Yes, I did just use that word. :o) )  I'm still smiling from the experience I had tonight.  2.5 hours of listening to an 80 year old man speak on the topic of God's Kingdom and His view of the world was SO exciting!  Walt Baker was a missionary to Haiti for around 50 years!  He and his wife raised 4 children there and when he boiled down his entire ministry he said, "Just love people.  Don't try to supplement what people can't do, compliment what they can do."  Story after story of this man's life showed his obvious love for his Father in heaven and thus his consequential love for those around him.  He challenged us, as the church, to "look WAY beyond yourself!  Look to the world!"  I'm SO ready to look to the world!  I've lost that focus in my life and I'm aching to have it return.  Thanks to Walt, it has been brought once again to the forefront of my mind and I'd be on a plane tomorrow if I could be!

Isaiah 61:1-3
"The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to preach good news to the poor.  He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion - to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.  They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of His splendor."  ~ My life verse(s) for the year....

Because I can't sleep...

Well, it's 1:00 in the morning and I still can't seem to get my mind to shut down.  About an hour ago I decided to start reading old journal entries in hopes that I would fall asleep from boredom. :o)  I guess I picked the wrong journal for that. 

Over the years I've kept journals and while I haven't been super diligent about it (as in writing every day no matter what happens) when big things happened, I journaled about them.  Well, I picked a journal at random and ended up reading about my time as a Journeyman.  How my life has changed since then!  There were aspects of life that I definitely had rose colored glasses about, but there are other aspects that I wish I had the same naive-ness about.  I read about some of the hardships that shaped who I am today and was encouraged to see incredible changes in my life that God brought about both through circumstances and just His incredible power.  However, I read hopes and dreams that I haven't thought about in a very long time.  I had BIG dreams then!  You know the "Use me to change the world Lord!" kind of dreams.  I wanted to spend the rest of my life overseas or at least going on short term trips.  I wanted to see people from the States gain an awesome understanding of how they could impact lives around the world through short term international mission trips and prayer.  I wanted to see the world come to Christ and glorify Him in every tribe and tongue!  I even decided I was going to marry a man I met while I was there because of the incredible Godly character he portrayed. :o)  (In my journal I wrote, "God, I would be willing to live in a forest and eat bugs if you would allow me to marry this man."  And for those of you who know me, you know that would be a sacrifice. :o) Well, I did end up eating bugs anyway, but that's another story for another time.)  But the excitement of knowing such an incredible man of God, one who had REALLY given up his life for the sake of Christ, who was not ashamed to stand up and be counted, who desired to see the world know Christ was attractive.  He was a spiritual leader in every sense of the word.  And tonight, I realized that I miss men like that.  I'm not saying they're not around, I know several of them, but when I look at all the men I know, how many of them are adventurers for Christ?  How many of them would give up their current situation to live in the jungles of Africa in a moment?  How many of them are willing to be the spiritual leader that women (not just their wives or future wives, but women in the church) need our men to be?  Where are these spiritual giants who aren't afraid to roar at the enemy?  To stand up for the poor and hurt?  To not be afraid of asking God for a godly wife and actually actively seek her out?  I'm not trying to be a man basher or anything here, I'm really not.  If I looked at the group of men I'm aquainted with, I could name several who are living their lives in incredible ways for the Lord.  But I'm sad to say that out of all the Christian men I know (or those who at least profess to be believers) I would have to say that less than half of these men have truly stepped up to the plate.  Have stepped into leadership because it is their calling from God.  Who have not allowed women to come in and take over everything because if they don't, no one else will do it.  Do you realize that somewhere around 75% of the single missionaries on the field right now are women?  That somewhere around 75% of leadership in our churches (both paid and lay leadership) is done by women?  I'm not complaining because these women are doing great things, but where are the men of God we need to rise up and walk with these women?  (And I don't mean just in a marriage sense here.)  What has happened to our society?  Women have stepped up too much and men have not enough.  I'm not saying women shouldn't hold leadership positions in the church or on the mission field and those of you who know me know I wouldn't say anything like that (I'd be contradicting my own life for goodness sake), but my hearts cry is for men to rise up.  To take the leadership that God intended for them to take and to run with it.  Be men who run hard after the Lord, be men who see life with God as an adventure.  Be men who are warriors for Christ.

I've lost contact with the man I was going to marry when I was in China. :o) He might be married to someone else now, who knows.  But in reading the things I wrote about him, I'm reminded of the things that drew me to him and what I wish I saw more often.  My heart's desire is to see more men rise up to the adventurous calling that is the life of Christ.  For men to come alongside some pretty incredible single women in our church and choose to live out that adventure side-by-side with them.  I look at our church and see women with incredible godly character and I'm praying that God will raise up men of faith that will change their lives and the way they see their Creator.  I'm excited to see how God chooses to answer my prayer.

Well, with that it's time to try to sleep again.  Maybe chatting about this will help me sleep, but probably it will just cause me to think more. :o)  Maybe I'll spend the time praying that God will re-light some of the fires in my heart that seem to have smoldered.  Until next time...