Waiting Room

A friend of mine posted this song on her Facebook page today and I can't believe how well it captures where my heart is right now!  For those of you who know me well, you know that my heart is captured by what God is doing around the world.  But every time I've tried to go back overseas, He has chosen to close that door.  I don't understand it, but Jonny Diaz captures my feelings perfectly in his song "Waiting Room".  Look it up to hear it (I'll be linking it on my Facebook page too).  But here are the words:

Here in this waiting room

Yearning for You to say go

And thought I'm convinced that a yes would be best

This time You're telling me no

It's not that I don't have an answer

It's just not the one that I'd like

But through this time Lord I must keep in mind

You're always wiser than I

'Cause You have a much better purpose

And You have a far greater plan

And You have a bigger perspective

'Cause You hold this world in your hands

The things that I seek are from You

Like the strong healing touch of Your hand

But when You say no, help me trust even though

There's a reason I can't understand

'Cause You have a much better purpose

And You have a far greater plan

And You have a bigger perspective

'Cause You hold this world in Your hands

When that miracle comes 'cause Your answer is yes

I will praise You for all of my days

But when Your wisdom declares that a no is best

I will praise You just the same

You have a much better purpose

And You have a far greater plan

And You have a bigger perspective

'Cause You hold this world in Your hands

You hold this world in Your hands

You know, I don't like hearing no from God.  Especially when I'm asking Him for something that's "good".  "Lord, don't you want me to go overseas and share your love with others?"  But then I look at who I am now, who I was 2 years ago, and who I hope to be in 2 more years and I realize where I've come from and where I'm going.  The "No" answer from the Lord has been a blessing for the last 3 years since I applied to go back overseas.  And even in the midst of the last couple of months where He has once again told me to stay, if I squint hard enough, tilt my head just right and stick out my tongue just the right length, I can catch a glimpse of what He might end up doing in my life here.  I'm learning to trust Him all over again.  And while it's hard, it's beautiful too.  Thank you Lord that you have a "much bigger perspective"!!!